Health at Every Size
“But I don’t want to die early because of my weight!”
“I’ll be happy/live my life/have everything I want when I’m finally skinny”
“My body is disgusting...I need to protect others from seeing it”
So what is HAES?
HAES (Health at Every Size) is a research-backed movement. It makes the statement that all bodies are good bodies and that pursuing health (or not) is a right we all have. HAES is a more holistic view of health. It incorporates our mental health into the idea of “well-being,” rather than basing our view of somebody’s health on their size or weight. To learn more about HAES, check out the organization’s page.
Why does HAES help me?
HAES provides a framework for seeing our body, as it is today, as a good body. It ignores what friends, family, and “well-meaning” Instagram followers express about your "health." It also disregards that new diet book you bought. Instead, HAES focuses on you. Your body is a good body despite what that annoying voice inside YOUR is telling you.Easier said than done, I get it. Diet culture has primed us for seeing our bodies as wrong and needing changed. We’ve heard it our whole lives.
Making the active choice to say “no more.”
Feeling like your body needs to be different to be okay feels insane
Convincing yourself to want it more
Pushing yourself to try harder
All of this because diet culture has convinced you that this is reality.
But my doctor said I need to lose weight!
Look, I don’t know what your doctor saw that prompted them to prescribe weight loss. I am not going to tell you to ignore your doctor.
What I am going to say though, is that your weight is not an indication of your health.
We all know that girl that can eat terrible, drink regularly, and treat her body terribly. But, however, she never gains weight. Nobody is expressing concern to her about her health. Why? Because she is just naturally skinny. I bet we also all know somebody who lives a relatively healthy lifestyle, works out, treats her body with love. But, others may view it as needing to lose weight because “health!” If that first girl could be naturally skinny, why is it so absurd to believe that girl number two is just naturally whatever weight she is?? All bodies can be healthy. All bodies can be not healthy. You cannot look at somebody’s body size and make any conclusions about their overall health.
What Research Shows Us About Diets
Also, did you know that 95-98% of diets fail? This means they don’t result in long term weight loss. If you are going to the gym because you love it, that’s amazing! But forcing yourself to go to the gym to burn calories or get thin in order to get healthy? That’s just going to make you miserable and it is not sustainable for the long term. The same goes for diets or eating “healthy.” If you enjoy kale, that’s amazing! But forcing yourself to eat it just because you “should be” isn’t helpful.
Research shows us that learning to accept your body and find happiness is more beneficial to your overall health. Additionally, it is better for your well-being than trying to lose weight. Because we all know how restrictive dieting goes. Eventually, we gain it all back again. This traps us in an endless cycle of yo-yo weight loss resulting in dissatisfaction and shame.
The Role of HAES
HAES is not suggesting throwing all caution to the wind, dining exclusively on McDonald’s french fries, and not leaving the couch. HAES does encourage eating based on hunger, fullness, nutritional needs, AND pleasure and enjoyment. Eat foods you like and fuel your body in ways that support you rather eating with the goal of weight loss. Same goes for movement! Move your body, but find ways that you enjoy moving! Maybe that’s yoga, weight lifting, or running. But also maybe that’s dancing, going on a walk with friends or your dog, or just doing work around your house. It’s all movement and it is all life-sustaining.
Wait...didn’t I hear something about HAES being rooted in racism?
Yes, there has been some conversation about HAES coming from a place of white privilege. It started as a radical way to fight the true lived experiences of medical oppression within a community of people with larger bodies. But, it is based in binary thinking and western-cultural beliefs. You can still practice HAES, but it is important to approach it through a lens of cultural awareness. HAES is not perfect. I am not either. I know that I, along with many other HAES professionals, am working hard to notice, change, and call out structures of oppression. Especially in this work. Just how we are each changing and evolving as we learn, so is HAES. For more information about this, here is a great resource written by the co-author of Body Respect.
Start Working With a HAES Therapist in St. Louis, MO
So you are ready to dive into the crazy world of learning to accept your body as it stands today. Congrats! That’s a HUGE step towards happiness. And frankly, it’s not an easy ride. Working with a HAES therapist and/or dietitian is a great start. There is a lot of unlearning and releasing of old beliefs that happen during this process. Do your own research and talk to your doctor. Maybe even join groups with like-minded people to support you on this journey. If you are interested in learning more about Health at Every Size and how it can benefit you, follow these steps:
Contact Embodied Self Counseling to learn about the services I provide.
Meet with me, Erin, for a 20-minute consultation.
Start the body acceptance journey.
Other Mental Health Services Offered by Erin Grumley
You're probably here because you have food, body, or exercise "things." I get it and I can help. I offer a variety of services in my St. Louis based counseling clinic and online. I provide HAES-informed eating disorder treatment for a variety of disorders. This includes Binge Eating Disorder, Anorexia, and Bulimia. In addition, I provide counseling for body image atypical anorexia, and perfectionism treatment. I offer online eating disorder treatment for men as well. Additionally, I frequently provide treatment for anxiety and compulsive exercise. I am also experienced in working with athletes and members of the LGBTQIA+ community in St. Louis, MO. All of my services are available through online therapy in Missouri and online therapy in Wisconsin in response to the COVID-19 pandemic.